The only phenomenon that remains permanent in human life is death, for each and every surviving soul shall reach his time. It is death that separates parents from Children, Wife from Husband, lovers from their loved ones, and human life from human world. Most moments it comes, it’s with no notice, it cares not the level, significant and consequentiality of the relating persons.
In putting down my tribute to Late Abdulqadir and my condolence to his wife Maryam, I begin in prayers: May Allah give you the strength to bear his loss, Maryam. May He grant him eternal rest. Whenever I look at you there is nothing I can say or do to take away your pain, Maryam. We have lost both parents and now, your husband, your soulmate, your one and only true love and your best friend is no more.
What can one say or do? The only thing is to pray and ask Allah to reward your patience, love kindness and care you have shown him tremendously. You have been there for him in sickness and in health without you ever complaining. You donated 60% of your liver to him. You both will forever be part of each other.
He died with you in his heart, and you have a huge scar that will never go away. What a sacrifice. If the tables were turned, Abdulqadir will donate 90% of his liver even if it’s a life and death Situation, he will choose your life over his. You both shared unconditional love with passion for each other, but he loved you more. He fought diabetes, high blood pressure, and liver damage. But by the speacil grace of Allah, he survived few more years when we all thought he was not going to make it. When he was going in and out of coma, he told Everyone that he is only fighting to stay alive because of you, Maryam, ALLAHUKBAR. “Maryam is the only reason I want to live”, he would say. I know how much you love him. But Surely, Allah loves him the most.
You did everything within your power to get his Health back. One year six months after your marriage, exactly on the 4th April 2017, on your 25th birthday you both underwent 14hours liver transplant surgery. On May 9th 2017, you both celebrated your 2nd year anniversary at the hospital recovering from the liver transplant. By Allah’s will he survived TWO MORE YEARS with your liver.
You pray together, he works at home, you eat together, you are always together, he cooks for you, he sometimes clean the house when you were looking for a house help, because he wants you to rest. He specially hand-makes diabetic sandwiches and food whenever your father is in kaduna and delivered it himself. He encouraged you to follow your dreams. He surprised you with four electric tailoring machines, and a generator. He made your dreams of MLK COUTURE becomes reality.
Your husband has never forgotten your birthday or your wedding anniversary. He celebrates your birthday and anniversaries, even when he was sick. Showered you with gifts. When our father died on January 2nd 2018, he took care of us and stood by us like a son our Mother never had.
Surely every soul will taste death. On February 12th 2019, in Cairo Dar al Fouad hospital, Abdulqadir passed away. And I quote doctors words, “he died peacefully” ALLAHUKBAR! On his death bed he prayed loudly for you Maryam and showered prayer with blessings on you. His family kept thanking you for donating your liver and standing by him till the last moment. We also thank them because I know he would do the same or far more for you in his condition.
May Allah grant him eternal rest. May Allah repay you tremendously, Maryam. Ya Allah bring joy, happiness and laughter and give her more strength to move on. Maryam May Allah reunite you and Abdulqadir in jannatul-firdaus. AMEEN.
You are truly missed, Abdulqadir. You will forever be in our prayers and memories. Allah ya gafarta maka Abdulqadir Ibrahim Gwandu
Kaita writes from Kaduna and can be reached through: Zlawalkaita@gmail.com